Three Lessons I've Learned From Coaching Highly Successful Individuals
Hi folks! I’ve decided to treat you all to a slightly different, additional newsletter this week. Hope you enjoy…
“It’s not what you know, but who you know…”
I graduated with my MSc from Loughborough University, ready for my career to land in my lap. After all, this was (and still is, according to QS rankings) the best institution in the world for exercise science and related subjects. I was ready for a big-name company to greet me with open arms, grateful that I’d applied to them.
The first application went cold, swiftly followed by the next five….ten….fifteen…
I decided to cool my expectations of immediate big-time wealth and status, and applied closer to home around Oxford. I eventually landed on a facility which allowed for exercise coaching, but was also partnered with some exceptional physiotherapists, business owners, and some really cool professionals in Harley Street, London, which is well known for private healthcare clinics. This combination of work location and professional connections was a stroke of fortune, which I’m only just realising the full extent of, years later. The people I met during this chapter of my life have undoubtedly shaped my professional and personal life since.
Had it not been for the pandemic, who knows if I’d still be there now? The business became unviable, and I moved to a self-employed role, armed with the lessons I’d learned over my three years immediately post-graduation.
However, I still reflect on this time of my life often. I had the privilege of coaching some incredibly successful people, and I don’t just mean successful in a financial sense. Yes, these lovely people were successful in their chosen careers and probably had a decent amount of cash somewhere, but there was so much more to them. These were the top 1% in their profession - some of Europe’s finest physicians, physiologists, and screenwriters. Elite military servicemen and women, those recognised by His Majesty the King for services to charity, and architects who worked on some iconic structures. Scientists and researchers with more publications than I can dream of ever understanding, let alone reading. I can comfortably say that these people have taught me as much about life as I have helped them with their health. In a parallel universe, I’d have happily paid them for the opportunity to sit down and chat about what makes them tick and how they got to be where they are.
A couple of weeks ago, I found myself reflecting on a coffee break from writing one of my newsletters. Despite the huge variety in chosen careers, these people did share many habits and lifestyles. I began to jot these down, and I eventually landed on my top 3, which I have compiled below.
Housekeeping
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Three Habits of Successful Individuals
To be clear, there were more than three shared values, habits and routines across this selection of individuals. However, I feel that the following three are perhaps the most important.
They embrace change
“Have you heard of ChatGPT?”
This was before it was cool to use AI, yet here I was, in my early 20s, being lectured about the benefits (and drawbacks) of artificial intelligence by a 70-something-year-old. He had spent the morning playing with it, asking it to solve his cryptic crossword and tell him more about some research articles he wanted summarising. This is just one example. Some of the most successful people I have worked with over the years have known about, and subsequently embraced, advancements in technology, amongst other big life changes, well before I was made aware of them.
Human beings are naturally hesitant with regard to change in life, especially technological advancements. Think about old Doris, who hates to use her contactless bank card, refuses to use the Sat-Nav, or is being left behind because they don’t use social media. They dislike chatbots and emails, often citing the need to “speak to a real person”.
However, this applies to so much more than technology. The successful individuals I know appreciate that changes in attitudes, research, and hypotheses are just a part of life. For the older clients I saw, they gave up cigarettes as soon as the research showed the true extent of the damage they could do. They have lived through, and accepted, that vaccines have all but eradicated measles and polio. They didn’t care when the British currency changed in 1971. For the younger clients, well, they were early adopters of computers, weren’t afraid to play on games consoles, and even recently developed their own apps. When they were made redundant from their jobs, they embraced the chance to relocate and try something different. When whispers about cryptocurrency turned into quiet shouts, they invested small sums of money and treated it as a ‘free hit’.
In short, these people saw change as an opportunity to advance themselves, rather than an excuse to be left behind. I know that this sounds like a cliché, but they were simply always ahead of the curve. Definitely food for thought given the current state of world affairs…
They know their own strengths - and capitalise on them
“I’m just not a morning person. My session with you at 7pm comes before I work 9pm-1am.”
Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a morning person. I’d sooner get up at 4 am for a run and to get work done than stay up after midnight. The individual responsible for the quote above is bonkers (and will admit this), but this is just the routine in which they work best. They still manage 7 hours of sleep every night and get up at 8 am, but they work late, free of distractions. Their routine is unique to them because that’s how they best work. If you’re reading this as a morning person with 2-year-old twins, you’ll probably have a completely different idea of what works best for you. However, you need an awareness of when you operate best.
In fact, one of my ice-breakers with new clients is “Are you a morning or an evening person?”. If you know when you feel most awake and productive, then try to do as much as possible within this window. If you’re groggy and grumpy between 9 am and 11 am, then you’re not going to change the world in this window. From my perspective, this also lets me know when the best possible time to schedule a 1-1 session is, or failing that, I can figure out when someone is more likely to stress-eat or binge-watch TV. Personally, I know that if I’m working from 5 pm onwards, I’m going to have to proofread and double-check it again in the morning with a fresh mind. I like to leave this time for socialising, switching off, and unwinding.
I appreciate that many of you reading this might be shift workers or in a 9-5, with a lack of time. However, there will be a period in your day, whether you’re at work or at home, that you feel most productive. Finding out when this is will be half the battle. Try to get your hard work done in this window, and leave the rest of your workday for the tasks which require less brainpower. If you’re self-employed, try, if possible, to cram work into those productive windows and minimise work when you feel like rubbish. These days, I will personally rather start early in the morning than go late at night.
Whatever your personal situation, find a 3-hour window in which you know you feel good. This is YOUR time. Use it to exercise, work on that project, that side-hustle, or whatever it is you’d like to focus on.
They don’t live life in black and white
“As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realised that very few things or people are inherently ‘good’ or ‘bad’.”
The cantankerous old git who said this to me was actually great fun, but loved to wind me up. However, he was being genuine when I shared this piece of wisdom with me.
And he’s in the minority for thinking this way. Purely from just my professional setting, I can’t begin to comprehend the number of people who have told me:
Running is bad for your knees
Intermittent fasting is the best diet for blood sugar
Seed oils are the worst cooking oils
Outside of the exercise realm, I’m drawn to other examples:
This current government is awful for everyone
Retirement is boring
Electric cars are useless…
One thing that my most successful clients had in common was their ability to appreciate nuance in life. For example, they appreciated that whilst running for 50 years may well lead to knee issues later in life, it could give someone great joy if that’s their passion. Electric cars may not necessarily have the range of petrol and diesel cars yet, but they do have environmental advantages. These individuals did have strong opinions, but they could see and appreciate the counterargument. If they met someone who had an alternative point of view, they wouldn’t shut them down; they wanted to know why they thought that way, and what it was that gave them different opinions.
Furthermore, they actually formed their own opinions. The younger generations (18-25y/o) seem to have lost or not developed this ability yet. Last year, a friend of an old client of mine, who falls into that age bracket, was lecturing me on how Elon Musk is “an idiot”. When I asked them why they thought this was the case, their best argument was simply that “everyone thinks he is”. Elon Musk may well be many things, but I’d struggle to call someone who has managed to build that level of wealth an idiot, just based on online opinion.
Just some observations
I’m not saying that everyone can simply adopt the above habits and transform their lives. I’m also not saying that these are the only factors or routines which made these people successful. However, I do think that the points I’ve made in this newsletter are what I would consider ‘good’ practice. If we all increased our self-awareness, stopped seeing the world in black and white, and embraced change, rather than fearing it, then I personally think the world would be a happier place.